Educated by Tara Westover (Read 7/21/19 o 7/25/19)

I don’t know what I was expecting, but it wasn’t this. Whoa she was part of a cult, hidden birth (no birth certificate until 9) no schooling, I missed that part in the description. Amazon description:

“Born to survivalists in the mountains of Idaho, Tara Westover was seventeen the first time she set foot in a classroom. Her family was so isolated from mainstream society that there was no one to ensure the children received an education, and no one to intervene when one of Tara’s older brothers became violent. When another brother got himself into college, Tara decided to try a new kind of life. Her quest for knowledge transformed her, taking her over oceans and across continents, to Harvard and to Cambridge University. Only then would she wonder if she’d traveled too far, if there was still a way home”

Her father is obviously mentally ill, but as a child she thought his obsessions and paranoia was normal life. I admit I had some issues keeping all the siblings straight, and by that I mean what age order.  Other than that, it was a really easy read, the subject matter may not have been, but Tara's storytelling was in an easy manner, like we were talking over coffee.

As an abuse survivor myself, I can see her acceptance of the past in the last chapter. And by acceptance I don’t mean forgiveness, I mean that she can accept the past happened and that her choices to no longer be abused had consequences. That was her education, she learned the truth of her childhood and the abuse, verbal, emotional and physical that took place and she choose to no longer accept that behavior towards herself. We all want when we say “this is not ok to treat me this way” to our loved ones for them to change the behavior, and it is heat breaking when they don’t.

I found her story entirely engaging and enjoyable, she had lived through a horror of a childhood. But it is not written with malice or hate. I can see how writing down her story was part of her healing process, and even after all she has been though how deeply she loves her family.

I have read some articles after finishing this book, that her parents are denying the abuse etc., it did not make me doubt her story. If anything it re-enforced my belief, their reaction is what would be expected, and gave her more credence in my mind.

I was not expecting to read about such a hard, controversial issue. But I feel Tara told her story with honesty and compassion and love. Her writing was easy and conversational. At its heart, it wasn’t a book about Mormonism or abuse. It was a book about Tara and the very personal journey she has taken to become the person she is.

Crisis Point by Trent Lott and Tom Daschle (Read 7/13/19 to 7/21/19)

This seems like a timely read with with the way politics are currently and as broken as Washington is. This book is written by two former Senators and was published in 2016. It is even more relevant in today’s political environment. Lott and Daschle spend the first part of the book talking about history and how our Congress came to be so dysfunctional. They talk about how it used to work and bipartisan bills would pass. Government is not meant to agree, but they are meant to compromise. Something I think our current Congress members have forgotten. Lott and Daschle have some bipartisan solutions to the issues too.

• A national primary day, all states vote in primaries on the same day, or regional primaries if not a single. 
• Change voting day from Tuesday to the weekend. 
• Develop an electronic voting system. 
• Limit campaign length, fixed starting point a few months out from the election. 
• Limit leadership PACs to the top 3 leaders on each side. 
• Transparency in super PAC donations 
• 5 day work week in Congress 
• Have senate and house in same schedule, 3 weeks on, 1 week off 
• Senators limited to serving on 1 major and 1 minor committee 
• Bills posted a minimum of 3 days in advance of vote 
• Return to the requirement that a Senator hold the floor in person to filibuster 
• Abolish dual tracking 
• Require a member to come to the floor to announce a hold 
• Require a year of national service (military, civilian, or volunteer through nonprofits or religious institutions) when between ages 18-28. 
• Student debt forgiveness for national service as an incentive. 
• Reimplement mandatory civics classes in high schools. 
• Private sector provide for service-sabbatical opportunities. 

All of those ideas seem reasonable and good starting points to make our government function again. They end the book with the following, “It is not only within our power to change things, it is our duty: we must work and fight for it.” It is not out government official alone who have to change the way they function, it is our duty as citizens to advocate and ask, and yes even sacrifice our personal wants, to evoke change that is best for out country instead of just for ourselves.

*Opinions expressed are solely my own and do not express the views or opinions of the US Government. None of the ideas expressed in this blog post are shared, supported, or endorsed in any manner by my employer.

Equal Rites by Terry Pratchett (read 7/11/19 to 7/13/19)

At first I felt that it is weird that this book doesn’t have chapters.

I forgot how much I love Pratchett’s tone, he really doesn’t take himself or his stories seriously. Which is why he is so much fun to read.  I really flew through the book, without chapters there are no natural stopping points lol

I really enjoyed the characters they were wacky and fun.  There was lots of humor, mostly of the dry British variety.  Good ending, leaves you wanting to read the next one.  Super fun 

How the Irish Saved Civilization by Thomas Cahill (read 6/29/19 to 7/11/19)

This book was not at all what I expected, but then again that is what I get for thinking I know what is going to be in a history book.This had a lot more about the Roman Empire than I expected, the entire first 67 pages in fact. It was fascinating to read about the rise of the monks and Catholisim in Ireland, and how it effected all of Europe.  I really enjoyed the writing tone, it was a history book, but the author had a sense of humor.  He kept it light with lots of puns.

Stonemouth by Iain Banks (read 6/3/19 to 6/9/19)

So this book is full of a lot of ambiguity regarding whatever the event was.  I felt like we didn’t move far.  I want to know what is going on though.  I don't care for time jumps and this book was particularly jarring for me.  I don’t like the flipping between past and present in the same chapter.  It’s confusing to follow.  We would flip in the same chapter an I wouldn't realized ht time period had changed at first.

It’s slow and most of the action is in memories of the past.  I was expecting more.  It felt like it took forever to get the story really moving.  

Overall this was an ok book, I had hoped it would be a little more fast paced.

A Man Called One by Fredrick Backman (read 5/4/19 to 5/27/19)

This is not my first Backman book.  I read My Grandmother Asked Me to Tell You She's Sorry and Britt-Marie Was Here.  This is written in the same style, I would call ironic minimalist.   He does not portray the characters in his book in a good light on the surface but they are always deeper than they appear.  And he pokes fun at society a lot.

Over grows on you, like so many of Backman’s characters they are really unlikable at first but as you get to know them and their history they become loveable.

The Sympathizer by Viet Thanh Nguyen (read 4/22/19 to 5/4/19)

This book made me feel really uneducated. I wonder if that is because the war was so bad for us and we lost that it isn’t taught as throughly as the wars we won?  I had a hard time finding a grove on this book...it drags for me.  I didn’t like this book, and after some reflection I realized I wasn’t supposed to. I didn’t like it because it made me uncomfortable. It showed some glaring gaps in my education when it came to the Vietnam war and the aftermath. I knew that out soldiers had been mistreated when they came home, but I had never given a thought about the treatment of the Vietnamese here or in Vietnam. And that made me uncomfortable to realize. This war showed everyone in a poor light, no one was on the right side everyone had an antagonist part to play. The world is violent, the author didn’t sugar coat it to make it easier for the reader, and he shouldn’t have. Maybe we have too sugar coated and blind to a giant historic event because it was unpleasant and we lost. This is one of those books that makes you not only look at the story, but society and yourself, and I didn’t like it because it wasn’t a favorable light. But with that being said I feel like at the end it clicked. I had borrowed this book from the library but I am going to buy a hard copy. I know I will want to read at least once more and I feel like this is a book my kids should have access to when older.

Milk and Honey by Rupi Kaur (read 4/4/19 to 4/4/19)

This was a BOTM read.  I do not like poetry.  It all feels too short, not matter the subject.  I feel like if I took snippets from letters and diary entries and put them in "poetry" format that I could have a book too.  The only poem I liked in the whole book was “The Vacation” on pg. 97.

So I already knew I wasn’t a big poetry fan, when this book was selected by the club.  I never have been.  Poetry rarely speaks to me like it does for some people.  I don’t have a favorite poem, and I don’t enjoy reading it.  I think that I always want there be more, more story, more something than poetry can give me.  Epic poems are better for me.  And this book did nothing to change that for me.  I thought this must have been a throw away book, published by an established writer and that it’s renown much be based on her reputation and not the book. But when I read that THIS was her first book and it is what earned her the renown, I literally threw up my hand and said I give up literary world.  In my mind, this book was not poetry, it was rants and soundbites.

Future of Silence Fiction by Korean Women (read 2/13/19 to 2/18/19)

This was the February BOTM pick.  This was a book of Korean short stories originally published in 1989, and had been expanded and republished in 2016.

O Chŏng-hŭi: “Wayfarer”: I think there was so much more to this story that we missed somehow. Besides the fact that she was accused of killing her lover because she was in her slip. And it sounded like she asked for the divorce not him? Did she ask for one because she was tired of the accusations? And if he didn’t want it why did he abandon her in the mental hospital? And what happened with her daughter? Why did the daughter say “mommy forgive us what we did was a crime”. Then later she said her daughter was a liar? I need to re-read the story.

Kim Chi-wŏn: “Almaden”: I agree the stories do not wrap up at the end...very strange.  Did anyone catch the hunger refrence? “She felt as if he had the soul of a beggar; he was a hungry man who could never be satisfied.” Its not as predominate as in the first story, but it was there. Maybe I’m just looking now.

Sŏ Yŏng-ŭn: “Dear Distant Love”: Her aunt had the right of it. Wow was she brainwashed or what. Staying with and for that asshat! What was the suffering supposed to lead her to? And why didn’t she take her kid and marry the lawyer or go to America? Ugh that was awful. I mean the writing was good, but man was it bleak

Pak Wan-sŏ: “Identical Apartments”: Oh my god this story was so boring, I couldn’t stand the author...she was a jealous petty bitch. The whole story was tedious and I couldn’t wait for it to be over.

And tha pact that she pittied her husband was awful too

Kong Sŏn-ok: “The Flowering of Our Lives”: I think she is a lesbian that wants to be a prostitute but isn’t? She the hunger and food was predominant again

Han Yujoo: “I Ain’t Necessarily So”: I have no idea what the point of that story was, all I can say is thank god it was short!

Kim Sagwa: “It’s One of Those the-More-I’m-in-Motion-the-Weirder-It-Gets Days, and It’s Really Blowing My Mind”: Ok this was a weird one! Was he dreaming, did he really go postal and murder those people? Were we inside the head of a schizophrenic? 

All the death happened at diner tables...and the sister became a pig?

Ch’ŏn Un-yŏng: “Ali Skips Rope”: Ok so I didn’t realize until the end that the narrator was a young girl. It made more sense then. This one seemed to make the most sense of all the ones we have read so far.

Kim Ae-ran: “The Future of Silence”: This one made my eyes glaze over, and I realized halfway through that I wasn’t retaining any of it and I had to start over.

This was depressing, and sad. And very sci-fi.

February 2019 to June 2019 Catch up

Mu Shi Shi Volume 1 by Yuki Urushibara (Read 2/3/19 to 2/5/19)

So this is my jump back into BOTM.  BOTM is doing an international theme this year, and we start out in Japan.  It’s a graphic novel that I purchased on my Kindle...yeah a little interesting to me too. So the kindle version you read backwards just like it was a physical manga, which took me a moment to figure out, but was very cool! 

Nine Perfect Strangers by Liane Moriarty (Read 2/5/19 to 2/11/19)
Oh Moriarty didn't fail me again!  This had a twist I didn't see coming.

That crumpled paper was due last week by Ana Homayoun (read 1/30/19 to 2/13/19)

My son has been struggling with turning in assignments and we spend a lot of time redoing assignments that he has rushed through in class. I picked this book up looking for some tips that may help me help him avoid this pitfalls.

There were a lot of examples of boys who struggled and then succeeded, but it takes forever to get into any actual tips.  So many of the stories are so and so was a great kid who was struggling until he learned her organization skills, but doesn’t explain what those skills are.  Finally starts to talk about how to organize a binder in chapter 5 (pg. 73), that is a lot of lead up time in my mind.  And even then the chapter was so full of case examples that the information was lost in the volume of text.  This was a very inflated book, thin information could probably been presented in a book 1/4 the size.  It also felt very sparse and just common sense. Phones silent and in another room during homework time, etc.

Almost Missed You by Jessica Strawser (read 2/18/19 to 2/21/19)
I really enjoyed this book until the last chapter.  The last 3 pages made me angry and disgusted.  The heroine turned out to be pathetic and lacked the ability to protect her child.  A marriage built on a lie that lead to a kidnapping.  Finn was a POS and Violet was pathetic.

Truly, Madly, Guilty by Liane Moriarty (read 3/1/19 to 3/5/19)
This was a great Moriarty, I spent the whole book wanting to know what happened at the BBQ.  Thankfully not what I feared most of the book.  There were so many little moving pieces of the story that when strung together equal the story of a few tragic minutes.  Love it!

Five Feet Apart by Rachel Lippincott (read 3/12/19 to 3/13/19)
I kept seeing the ads for this movie and decided to read the book.  It was a really sweet young adult knowledgeable about forbidden love and heartbreak as well.  It made me cry, like ugly cry.

Three Wishes by Liane Moriarty (read 3/13/19 to 3/17/19)
I liked the book because it was Liane Moriarty, and it had twists and turns and wonderful characters and relationships.  But the story itself and the characters were my least favorite of her books.  

The Host by Stephanie Myer (read 3/17/19 to 3/25/19)
I saw the movie year ago and I always meant to get around to reading the book.  By the time I did, I didn't really remember the details.  I can tell it is part of a series and and I wanted to pick up the next one.  I liked it a lot better than the Twilight series.  Still feel some of the characters are unhealthy relationships, bu not as much as Twilight.

Before I Go to Sleep by SJ Watson (read 3/26/17 to 3/28/17)
This was a great book!  Christine forgets who she is every night and wakes up to her loving husband who cares for her.  But everything is not as it seems, what is real and what is not.  How can she know when she can't remember the previous day?  This was a page turner!  

My Sunshine Away by MO Walsh (read 3/28/19 to 4/2/19)
This is the story of a girls rape from a boy's perspective.  How it effected the neighborhood and the boy's life.  It was an ok read, I thought the story flowed and I read it fairly quickly.  I didn't hate it, but I didn't love it either.

Ordinary Grace by William Kent Krueger (read 4/2/19 to 4/4/19)
This was a story that I flew through.  Sadly I didn't take notes, and as I only gave it three stars, I'm not really surprised I can't remember the details.

The Library Book by Susan Orlean (read 4/6/19 to 4/17/19)
I hated this book!  It was awful and jumps from past to present.  It jumped from building the library, to the fire, to her writing about the library.  I'm sure it would have been a wonderful history of the LA library if maybe she had stayed in a timeline.

The Proposal by Jasmine Guilory (read 4/17/19 to 4/18/19)
I really enjoyed this book, it was a very typical romance.  But it was super light hearted and a very easy read.  The characters were likable and fun.

All We Ever Wanted by Emily Griffin (read 4/18/19 to 4/22/19)
I liked this book, it was about scandal and people learning to be true to themselves.  

In Enemy Hands by David Weber (read 5/17/19 to 5/11/19)
This is my boyfriends favorite in the series, and I can see why.  Honor is such a force, the honor and fortitude this woman has really is to be admired.  And the loyalty she inspires is breathtaking.

Echos of Honor by David Weber (read 5/11/19 to 5/21/19)
I would have liked this book to focus a bit more on Honor and not so much what was happening at home.  But it was a daring escape, 100% of what I would expect from Honor.

Ashes of Victory by David Weber (read 5/21/19 to 6/3/19)
Once again an Honor Harrington book, not about Honor Harrington.  It was a ok book but I wanted more of what Honor was doing, she really took a side role in her own story.

The Best of Me by Nicholas Sparks (listened 5/3/19 to 6/10/19)
Well we have come to expect poignant love stories from Nicholas Sparks, but this was a real heartbreaker in the end.  I put down my physical book and looked for excuses to listen to the audio book the story had me so engrossed.

Where the Crawdads Sing by Delia Owens (read 6/9/19 to 6/11/19)
Prologue starts with the heat of Chase Andrews.  Then chapter one jumps back in time to 1952.  I was very worried at first about the time jumps, they are often hard for me to like.  This was a fealty good read though.  The time jumps weren't jarring like I worried.  They actually moved the story along quite nicely.  To tell the truth, I was fooled right up until the epilogue as to what actually happened.  This was a really great book, I flew through it.  The characters were great as was the setting.

Daisy Jones and the Six by Taylor Jenkins Reid (read 6/12/19 to 6/19/19)
This was so well written that I had to google to make sure they were not a real band.  The story was engaging and the twist at the end, did not see that one coming AT ALL.

The Night Tiger by Yangsze Choo (read 6/19/19 to 6/21/19)
This had some mystical realism to it.  I read this on our Alaskan cruise after the kids went to bed and all I could do was read, couldn't leave the room and couldn't watch TV.  I'm not sure I would have made it though so quickly under other circumstances.  The characters were fine, and the story was fun. But it didn't stick in memory as an amazing book.

Bitter Ashes by Sarah C. Roethle (read 6/21/19 to 6/22/19)
This was again needed as a quick read at night, it was ok.  The writing was a little rough, I think it was a self published, it was missing some polish on the writing an editor would have brought.  The story was interesting, Norse Gods and all.  The book ended on quite the cliff hanger, so even though some parts were a tough read I think I am going to be forced to read the rest of the series.

Wicked Intentions by Elizabeth Hoyt (read 6/22/19 to 6/28/19)
This was a very typical romance with a little bondage included, 17th century wantonness.  Like most romance novels, the story was a little unrealistic.  Writing was really good though, there was good character develop in the narrow channel of the romance story.  The murder twist was fun, and added an element of danger.

Marrakech Noir by Yassin Adnan (Read 8/9/18 to 8/17/18) - 3 Star

This was a book I received as an advanced reader copy from Librarything.com.  It is a collection of short Stories.  I have decided to review each one below.  Overall I thought it was well written, and it was interesting to read the perspective of the Marrakech Muslims.  I may not have alway understood all the nuances but I really enjoyed the new points of view.  It was not what I thought it would be when I first picked it up, it was far less crime and more human condition stories.  All of the stories rambled a bit and most of the authors didn't see to have a strong storyline to me.  Often it felt that there were too many characters and no resolutions.

The Mysterious Painting by Found Laroui - This is a simple mystery, short and quick but well paced.  I liked the way the chief followed they mystery.

A Noisy Disappearance in an Ill-Reputed Alley by Allal Bourqia - I totally missed the point of this story.  I may have missed cultural cues.

Looking at Mars in Marrakech by Abdelkader Benali - So much ambiguity, and a sci-fy story was very unexpected.

Other Places by Mohamed Zouhair - This is a sad story of longing and loss.  It also showed a man's view of a woman's perspective.

The Mummy in the Pasha's House by Mohamed Achaari - This story was too jumpy, it felt very disjointed to me.

A Way to Mecca by Hanane Derkaoui - This was the 1st female author in the collection, and she took on some subjects that were very suprising, and what I would have thought of as taboo:  Homesexuality in Muslims.  It was a very well written story.  I found that it was interesting that it was a flip of Other Places with a woman who is writing a man's perspective.

The Secret in Fingertips by Fatiha Morchid - Another female writer, she is is also another very good writer.  This is a story with lots of twists and turns, and a heart of gold.

Delirium by Mahi Binebine - This was a weird split personality story, and it made no sense to me. However the writing flowed very well.

In Search of a Son by Mohamed Nedali - I didn't understand the ending.

Mama Aicha by Halima Zine El Abidine - I think this was my favorite story, it was beautiful, heartwarming, and profound.

Frankenstein's Monster by My Seddik Rabbaj - Entertaining and full of superstition, no real point though.

An E-mail from the Sky by Yassin Adnan - I had problems jumping from perspective to perspective.

A Twisted Soul by Karima Nadir - Beautifully written and full of sadness.

Black Love by Taha Adnan - It was a little long and twisty, but in the end it tied up nicely.

A Person Fit for Murder by Lahcen Bakour - Finally a story like I thought this book would be.  Muder and sadness!

The Quintland Sisters: A Novel by Shelley Wood (Read 1/27/19 to 1/29/18)

I received this book from Goodreads in a giveaway, it is to be released March of 2019.

This is historical fiction of the lives of the Dionne quintuplets from the point of view of their nurse Emma Trimpany.  At four months of age they were made wards of the state for the next nine years under the Dionne Quintuplets' Guardianship Act, 1935.  The Ontario provincial government and those around them began to profit by making them a significant tourist attraction. Almost 3,000,000 people walked through the gallery (their home) between 1936 and 1943 and brought in more than $50 million in total tourist revenue to Ontario.  Their parents spent the entire time fighting for custody of the sisters. This book covers the years 1934 through 1939.

The story starts out with the babies birth.  Emma is a really easy character to listen to. She is very much focused on the babies and lets a little of the rest of the world go.  I like the writing style. It has a nice smooth flow, and makes it easy to get into the story.  Just the right amount of detail to set the scene, but also allows my imagination to fill in the complete picture. It drew me in from the first page and I had a hard time putting it down.  The story is so fascinating, knowing that it is true made me want to research as I read.  I found myself doing lots of google during and after in order to see pictures of the girls.  I really enjoyed the interspersing of newspaper articles, the research for this book is superb.  The entire story broke my heart from start to finish.

Raising Children with Grit by Laila Y. Sanguras (read 1/24/19 to 1/27/19)

This was a book from Early Reviewers. It grabbed me right from the intro.  “Grit is the combination of passion and perseverance.”  That is an amazing definition and exactly what I want to give my children’s.”  She goes on further to talk about studies and grit  and how grit can effect our children success more than anything.  ”That means that grit, a construct we can help our kids develop, has a greater impact on success than a fairly stable characteristic like IQ.” Wow, just wow.  Then I really knew I was going to find common ground with her because of this:  “If you love the notion recognizing faux achievements, then we should probably (respectfully) part ways because we are fundamentally so different that you will hat me by the end of the book.”  I fundamentally agree with her.

I am a fairly even mix between Authoritative (39%) and Authoritarian (35%) and I would say that is correct.  I try to be firm and “The Parent” but to allow for the ability to develop independence, granting greater freedoms the older they get.  I suspect the Authoritarian parts of my parenting style are what lead to some of the conflicts and issues with my children.  I’m also a free range parent, although I was under the misconception that it meant permissive.  It is described as “a common sense approach. Parents keep their children safe without protecting them too much from life.”  That is my exact goal and policy, although I don’t know that I am always successful at it.  I’m also a consultant parent, because I absolutely believe it is better for a child to make a mistake when the consequences are less than when they are an adult.

It is a small book, but packed with lots of helpful information and ideas.  I think this is one I will come back to time and time again for reference.

Pretty Little World by Elizabeth LaBan and Melissa DePino (Read 1/21/19 to 1/23/19)

This is a Mom’s Book Nook Book of the month. It is the story of three families that tear down their walls literally and combine their three individual homes into a single large home.  My best friend lives 3 houses down from me and we do lots of stuff including holidays together, but sharing a kitchen and living rooms sounds like the end of our friendship to me.

The wives are for,  2 of the 3 husbands are ok with the idea. The hold out changes his mind when he had a medical scare and the crazy commune idea begins.  It went about like how I expected, drama and weirdness, and not really working out.  But only one family was broken up, and that break up really had nothing to do with the commune.  I liked the writing, it was easy and light and the story moves at a good pace.  It felt predictable, but that is ok.  Sometimes it's nice to have a fun light book to read.

Bird Box by Josh Malerman (read 1/20/19)

So this has been on my TBR pile for a while, but it got moved up because of the Netflix movie release. I literally read this on one sitting.  This was so suspenseful and easy to read.  I had to know what happened to her housemates and if she made it to where she was going.  I could not find a stopping place. The writing was so fluid and vivid.  The details so sharp that even with the few given it creates an image that is intense and dark.  I really like the idea of limited imagery, because the characters are blindfolded, and really it much more visceral than that, and the writing invokes that darkness and suspense with an ease, I didn't find it scary, I found it thrilling.

** SPOILERS***

Watched the movie.  They changed so much, the way Malorie joins the house, who is in the house, her sisters name and death. The way she travels down the river. Although John Malcovich as Don/Douglas is amazing casting though, even better than I imagined.  They are on the River much longer than in the book too.

Malorie never would have made one of the kids look at the rapids, the one part where she had to pick the right river fork, she looked. Tom lived past the birth!  What?  Tom’s death so much more dramatic. The kids never disobeyed.  But the ending was perfect.